I really actually and exactly know it, genuinely so wonderful and magnificient masterpiece could be outputted at so cheaply regarded and derogated by anybody who loves only appreciating some other ones’ works.

But only the creators who privide each created thing knows well, any masterpiece must be made midst very many eraborated but just misscarrage done things in serially made flood.
That would be somewhat like probablity’s experiment.

Though, so occasiinally so louder voices by any kind of poor works’ scream, and even I could never close my ears toward that noise so easily, because all of them originally were made by myself, you know!

Very awfully confused and never convincing regarded so cheaper levelled strange but unidentified some intriguing nature thing rather sustains and advocates my personal mind, nevertheless, publicly any assessment or kind of public fame, reputation or so as the completed fantasy specifically to myself could show me so showy and gaudy, just flamboyant appearance, that must be kind of Satan!

Very screwed-up and only rarely rough and rugged scraps are anytime besieging me and my life cycle. And only they are smiling to me showing so vivid and candidly outspoken sadistic rejoice to tease me.
Yes, sometimes, I impulsively have irresistible wanting mind to yell, scream, ejaculate to anything, be demolished, be dumped to the hell, die out all of you throughout around me!

And subsequently I wanna cry out, be beside me, any junk idea, tips of my uncompleted masterpieces, any kind of aborted good ideas might have been made to superior masterpiece!

Damn, all those so beautifully pretended words and applauding message!
Only abandoned and forsaken all gunky and dirtily oily ideas and ligering attached very fascinating dregs, and dishonesty, all perverted sooky zombie ideas and fantasies!
Be my guest, don’t forsake me, don’t leave me alone!

Disorderly drifting and adhering my body and soul, these all are just seen so sinisterly, however, just all of you could keep my nerve and sanness of my mind so honsetly and tightly!
Hold me thight! So fuckin’ crazy ideas and implicative imagination in my mind, and any laid and left, forsaken trivially meaningless reckless thoghts’ flood and so only tremoring carrying ridiculous ideology and premise which work ineffectively, all of empty your calling voices and so vecantly echoed sounding reverbration, these all are my hoping star quarified presence, you agree!

Instantly passing gust, that is you, all collected smashed trashes and rubbishes!
I’ll either from this moment on, asskiss you all, so sincerely and prudently you know, because I know so well, only all of you must never forsake me no matter what kind of worst situation or condition surrounds me, that conviction just props up my ordinarily necessary mind.

You, all seen so unnecessary things, please from now on, be my the best counsellors, and easy fellow or bad friends to me, beside me and close to me, please, as now you are!

Nov. 29th. 2021

Memorandum; For the present, this theme series ends, but this idea and ideology must never be converted in my mind either from this moment on. And at another form, this theme could come up to me, so everlastingly as long as I could survive this world.