Escape Road Part 36 Junchansan chapter Revenge 4

Mat was in his home country, but at that day, he mourned his dead lover. He lost his preciously beloved one who had intimate relationship with him several years only with accidental meeting to a woman who had only intimate three days relation but at forth day after meeting together, had been robbed by other man’s conspiracy and six days after meeting, being dead, that six days changed Mat’s life, and lost things were extraordinarily bigger than he would imagine.
On the hill of the local area Lily was born, her funeral was proceeding with her family and friends.
Mat looked at every participants of her funeral, at a glance to each one so rapidly.
Lily’s brother, sister, Jeff, his wife, Tim, his colleagues with the same mission to investigate missing middle-aged woman who was dead at the same day of Lily’s anniversary day of her death, a pastor was reading one passage from the Bible, and every participant listened to it, so quietly, many ones closing their eyes.


Mat remembered the few ten minutes ago, when he first arrived at her new grave marker, he was with Lily’s brother and sister, and soon Jeff arrived there with his wife, looking at Mat’s face, and said soon after greeted only with eye contact and face moving,
“Only a week I’ve never seen your face, but your it was so changed to be drawn, haggardness of you makes me imagine how tough your travel for the days was, but what the hell did your way-worn travel give you something? Possibly nothing you know, rather, you lost everything, didn’t you?”
Mat was saying so slowly to his saying,
“I know so well, but now I have no words for the present. Just…”
“Just what?”
“At last everything may had been a destined thing to me and Lily, either.”
Mat after deleting any misty mind darkness said to Jeff, he responded with his honest question,
“By the way, how precious was your meeting to that woman? Was that that valuable to the being of that woman daring to cost Lily’s life so precious of you, essentially? Costing your beloved lover for getting strange woman you’d never met ever.”
To that question of Jeff, Mat had nothing to reply.


Lily’s brother as high school student next year would graduate, Lily’s seventeen sister was weeping so in sorrow but voiced nothing next Mat.
Mat was in an idea how he would sustain her left brother and sister.
Mat was making up his mind to keep his detective job also from that moment on to the long future.


After expiring her funeral pastor’s greeting, her coffin was buried to her graveyard, and before burying, at a glance everybody as the participants of her funeral looked her face, it was so beautiful as she was so usually.
Some colleagues with the same mission to her was devoting bouquet beside her face.


After every process to morn her death, Jeff approached Mat and said,
“I can understand your mind being in a strong emotion to revenge that one, but even if you did so successfully, how would Lily’s brother and sister survive from that moment on. They were raised by Lily.”
After sighing for a second, and he continued,
“If you are willing to continue your job, I’ll help you as I’ve done until now, but if you try to revenge him, you would never return to you as honest lover of Lily or gentle citizen, as you are now. In other words, you must bring you about the road your target old man passed ever who killed Lily, you could never help but following footprints he must had left in his lifetime.”
Listening to his saying, Mat for a while silently thinking his saying meaning, and urged Jeff to continue his claim to him,
“In other words, you mean you walk in the toughest way on thorn road, that old man has walked ever, as long as you are doing job of private detective, as I did, I’ll help you also from now on, but so risky revenging act would never be accepted to me, possibly, of course that old man is just the shared enemy also to Lily’s family, but how will your revengeful mind share them all, so easily, it must be so risky.”
He who was whispering his saying words, tried to soothe Mat’s resentment.
However, also Jeff was in so entangled emotion, that emotional contradictory atmosphere was either shown to Mat, and he was asscertained to it, either.


(to be continued)


(Jan. 19th. 2019)

Love Makes Love


Love is made of your trust.
If you want to trust someone, that one must react to your trust.
Love’s mother is believing.
If we lose any trust when we each are so hard, love must be raised naturally, necessarily.


Love makes love again.


If believing mind was never absent, your travel to the future must be started and done so as you hope to be done at least your first motivation.
Believing heart must gather any trust to you by each someone.


Someone must be present in anyone.
So precious someone must be found out only with your strong will to believe in your tomorrow as the bread.
Daily bread must feed pabulum.


If you hold unnecessary distrust on your mind to anybody, nobody must never smile to you, your hope must not yet be met.
But possibly even its persistence may have been your first necessary step for the next phase.
Your mind degree may had been raised step by step, never at a stretch. Thus, toward your hopeful future, its inevitable daily truth in distrust or weaver may have been the same, never changed forever.


But even it would be true, you needn’t to be exhausted, coz sometimes even empty emotion or light fatigue are needed either to you, for making you sometimes introspect by yourself for your proceedings.
Every mindset you make relies on your own idea anytime you hold.


When you are hard, you might ask someone.
And never forget that one’s help in your mind as a small gift.
So, any small gift is hidden in anywhere according to your composed and calm your mindset in your daily life.


Walk, step, sometimes jump, but insert your enough rest and sleep!


Believe your tomorrow for your joyfulness, it must keep you to be in vigor to create another something even you’ve never met ever.


Love your trust making you and love itself must make another love again!
Breath in everything so deeply, and breath out any waiste of your breathing.


You are always here, being here in capability to see and get prospect of there must be your true pal in your breathing life.


Freeze your sinful unnecessary idea to the trash can.
Sometimes, it calls you, but throw it away with your room dust,
and forgetting it, you can sometimes drink and play.


Dawn again you see, you must restart everything with your steady hope wrapping all of your past sadness.


You are all things present in this world.
Never with its idea, you must never able to go forward.


Take your step crossing the mystified fluffy shadow and vaguely warm sunshine to a bottom of your heart.


You are the heart, you are the mind, it means your ability to change anything a sure trust, only its fact must bring about you to the complete love in believing.


If you can be sure of getting new love and believing your trust felt in your sure moment, you might jump, or fly to the air in shouting and see further landscape, it would tell your next step forward you must stay sometime.


Be with soothing power to emit any energy when you are in risky moment.
Even if you conftont any risk, you must be tide over everything, as long as you believe in love with trust to each other.
It must be sustained and guarantted by your mind God.


Flame your heatbeat to be in passion.
Because you must be the sunshine anywhere you stay.
You are us, we are you, and they are us, we are them.
So, every equality must bring about every being in universe, the meaning.


So as to say, eventually, you are meaning, as you are yourself.
Only it must be absolute.
Only it must light everything in darkness.


Kiss your sleep, hug your awakening.
Ceress every shadowed light.
Your mind sunshine always kindles you’re the coldest idea.
If you cross everything to lighted warmness, your inner voice must talk even to evil and its evil must change your dream or hope to the future.


Your mind presence is ability, helpfulness to everything.
You are also able to cross yourself to God.
God must stay only at your believing trust to everything.


You are the capacity to change anything to be a trust.
Only it must be the world trust as the only one can create absolute light and God gift to everything.


Yell wishing everything in your mind to the sky and heavenly lighted sunshine.
It must prepare for your rest with the night shadow in darkness.


Every cicle must be the one, eventually.
Being must tell you everything.
So that fact is the sole love.
Love is being.
Being is universe.
Universe means God.


Love is love, God, being, any space, any time, any being appearance in turn.


Smile to everything, with it you must gather everything.
When it would be fulfilled to your mind and other’s ones, you are the absolute.
Absolute is love.
Nothing must be needed but it.


(Jan. 18th. 2019)

To the one Never Sinful as if being criminal, nor Never great Rebelious one, but the One obviously just only Awkward in only Honesty


Anyone must have fovor and hate, even if so logically thought and evaluated in knowing, still liking or never getting to be hateful, that kind of thing must be present to anybody.
It must never be the idea with philosophically thought nor jusutice.
Very necessary that there’re the great ones, and they are even fulfilled any great achievement, simultaneously the evil did either for doing so, necessarily, never surrounded by any evil in the past but eventually either great was so exceptional in religion history.
Coz in the great religion historical ones, genuinely pure and great ones in terms of personality, character of human are never so many, rather they as so exceptional are in mixed together with great but never so genuinely pure ones as so many mumbers.
But eventually, so familiar and favorable than greatness, very loved by anybody coz they are with never skillful thing, even if they’re never so sophisticated, so as to say, even with talented part they have, but just never so applicable to these tarent, or just carelessly so unskillfully done everything in never so smooth life, that kind of ones are never so few, I see, so surely, you know.
Thus, toward only that kind ones, I sometimes want to tell something continuously, actually in my days.
Of course, only that kind of stance I must never treat so precious, but the moment to be in that feeling must be present to me, too. Never so few chances to me, too.
You must had been so well than you’d done, but with your trivial carelessness or negligence, or so tiny evil emotion jumping the gun, you’d spoiled something so utterly and never fatal false, you’d never done, but in so futil time spensings or so in useless roundabout you’d taken, in other words just for all of you being so, I want to tell something.
If you are told by somebody as if I explained now, the ones who are sympathized with my example to be the one, that kind of ones are never so few, seen to me so, but your life must neve expire and with hope and dream, I want you all to spend left your lifetime until you die, I surely wish so.
That example would be adopted also to the ones who are thinking no loger so young, or abaondoning everything, if you are in reformative mindset again, you also who are only with remorse or regert to the past false or failure, either, once you can reset everything as much as possible in your sure trial, can’t you?
Coz you are never the ones being so great but also with wicked or evil and never accomplished any that kind of things, neither, you can feel so surely to spend so significant life of you from that moment on, can’t you?
If you can think so, toward you are the ones with never so smoothe and wisely tactful life of you, do never so servile nor obsequios to anything, just you might introspect your passing road of you again and try to never do the same false or mistake and do everything in your life so carefully as much as possible, do never servailant nor subservient to anything!
Because you are never the ones who had betrayed someone nor plunge, entrap anyone actually.
You are either never survived only with gentleness nor kindness, but as long as you’d never breached nor violated the world wost evil or to say, even the one only surviving with every worst thing, your imagining evil you’d taken was never so bad than your sinful emotion, for the present, I want to tell you all who had spent the says only with being jerky to everything or incogulous to everything, again.
Don’t spoil your life itself in your unnecessary persistence to your bad past!
You might enjoy your life and yourself as you’d spent in your days of your life.
And only with some interest or concern to the matter you’d never done so well, be careful and take notice of only what you can absolutely reform, except these mindsets, you are wholly right to be so as you are, I’d like to say so, too, to you.
If you meet the ones who claim that thing around you, you should never be the pals nor partners of you.
Eventually, all you have to do is just only be polite to the one who is never hating and doing malicious thing to you, then you are never neede to be changed from now you, as to be.
Yes, let me suggest to you, the life of human is the one which we cannot expect any good meeting to someone and something, and you must never be needed to be servile nor so supple to kissass someone or something in stragely unnecessary anxiety.
Yes, I want to say, just only things like that.
Even if saying so important but so difficult thing, it would be precious but on the background of it, there’s a mind to say only so simple things, you know.
(Jan. 18th 2019)