“To my eyes, surely, my life running road inviting any amusement and occasionally healable fantasy are suddenly coming up to my mind, but my long traveling road otherwise is launching to conclusion finding mode, probably epilogue's beginning. Anyway, any human individual must die another day.”

These words are what I received from one of older Fr◯nc◯ friend of mine, and he was journalist who was dead at almost beginning day in Ukr◯◯n◯ who once met one Ukr◯◯n◯◯n soldier who was helping bombed ruine attended corpse all's burial to temporarily installed graveyard, whose name was Domitory, but in fact afterward we'd known that truly he was Russian nationality citizen as younger soldier but with several so serious circumstance, he pretending Ukr◯◯n◯◯n soldier and at each location, only very short stay, he'd made, but his father was R◯ss◯◯n who were dead at his infatile days, and his mother is alive as an Ukr◯n◯◯n citizen in Moscow.

That friend was my Paris youth age's own close friend these days worked at firm office in Paris, he occasionally helped news reporting company's own collecting data around useful valuable news sources. 

His writing thing showed some his positioned circumstance's difficulty. But to me, that his sufferable realities could be easily overlapped with mine. Of course its reason is unidentified to me too.
Just I wanted to see Tannya again and hug her strictly. I missed her.

Now I stay at not training days in small hotel located at F○j○-Y○sh○d○ city's central area. Training field zone was located beside sea of trees entrance zone. I used car for any locomotion provided by Z, some mission's readiness was gotten help from J○p○n's police organization and self-defense forces' some officers. 

Our crews unit was occasionally gathered and for emergency we did very hard field training, but except I called them five, anybody used each own private time, but frequently our commanded geographical location is switched at no obvious expected condition, even if anybody could not have stably contactable steady partner. Probably anytime at any place, anybody has own temporary partner at each occasion.
But, according to dead Y's memo she left according to her dying moment approaching to her sixth sense, she had own husband when she worked at a firm in Beirut, she met future her husband at her work, but he was not Arm○n○○n. He was French who had also Arabic pedigree's current and ordinary French one.
In conclusion, because she was very clever at using French and English too, additionally she had well understanding and had so profound knowledge of financing and accounting it too, though she was given chances to go abrord frequently and except afterward married with the husband in question, she had pregnancy and had a boy, she constantly went abroad, and for her overseas life running made her so many chances to get another job, work, job content, not needing persistance around specifically limited it.
From her memo she wrote for sending us all, before she was dead in hunch of being murdered.  
I was unconsciously cross over my ex-pal providing Domhtory's memo and deceased Y's memo replaced with her suicide note. Because both very seriously last-ditch situated motivation dragged writing thing. 

Y's suicide note was starting as diary for the beginning. But that was started by her threat caused from chased, shadowed by somebody in sixth sense. As emergency of her murdered in sinister hunch, she consciously started writing anything. When she was engaged in agent mission. She had not clarified her guided into that agent's job in that suicide note, but she was very smartly intelligent at speaking, listening to any foreign language, though she must have been scouted by C○A's superior officer agents or so.
Her probable hunch around murdered by some plural ones were made around the term N○g○rn○-K○r○b○kh regional conflict was deteriorated at 2016. 
She intuitively knew that because she worked as C○A agent, some extremists of patriotism abiding conservative sympathizers were conspiratorially regarding her as betrayer of Arm○n○○n, because those days, Arm○n○ was diplomatically helped by R○ss○○n army and Az○rb○j○n was advocated by U○A.

Her memo claims like next. "Recently, I am constantly tailed by very many plural male adult ones from any angle at distributed role previously precisely schemed. Though at any angle behind me, some dubious move has been instinctively felt and sensed so physiologically, so obliged fact, consequently."
After all, at least to me, taking into account my job conent and now missing Tannya, necessarily Y's suicide note was some encouraging message around prosecution of my given mission. 
And at some mind I was engaged in the last mission for me, her last message was spiritually useful for mitigating my anxiously kept future anxious unease. Because my mind was almost made those days. (now I cannot confess precisely, but almost I made up my mind around next doing after I quit C○A agent's bottom mission) Though I was encouraged by Y's last memo description when I neatly arrange for next given mission doing previously I tried beforehand I head for mission doing site.

(Irregularly continued)

June. 2nd.    2023